The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

First topic message reminder :

What, now?

Yeah.
It caught my eye from about 30 m away... it was so indiscreet in its movements. (shudder)

General Francisco Franco,  
I had some of those old football jerseys from the 70s too... the original ones. They are so scratchy (awful material) and people back then had different shapes. Skinny midgets they were apparently.

Got one from Brazil (Flamengo) but the biggest size was for a person weighing about 62 kgs. They were all featherweights with small physiques back then.... or the bigger ones had sold out. <<- lol ->>

It's in my cupboard here still along with a few jerseys, basketball singlets and other sporting artifacts.

I hate it when wasps are indiscreet. Such gossips.

JuliusHMarx wrote:I hate it when wasps are indiscreet. Such gossips.

Yes, I'd agree. They have considerable trouble keeping their pièces buccales (jaw-like things) shut.

"That is cool mate, I own a few throwback basketball jerseys, and got a few old English kits from my grandfather when he passed, but nothing major. "Isco" is the Castillan variation. I have the Catalán one "Cesc", which is a cruel joke as I have mildly xenophobic feelings about Cataláns. If I could be bothered, I'd definitely get it legally changed. I can't though... be bothered.

Speaking of Cataláns bloody Bastards still want their independence.

Chris Froome is a numpty.

You just hate him because he isn't Born in Britain. He's a nice guy, has an apartment/complex in Parktown, and by all second hand accounts is a pretty cool dude.

Partly true. Don't consider him English (or British at all).

Think he's a soft c*ck with a selfish attitude. Pulled out of Tour this year when Gerraint Jones bust his butt for him last year with a broken pelvis. What he did to Wiggins was all about his ego and showed his true colours. Also possibly not riding the tour this year because it is too 'hilly'.....

Parktown looks very nice, Cesc. You have some very nice suburbs there.

Looks very similar to the North Shore where I grew up... but with less water.
Lots of parks and golf courses... some might think they take up too much space but I can't get enough of grassy fairways, clusters of trees and picturesque lakes. Makes for the ideal environment to get attacked by birds too...

I feel as though I somehow must be related to Capability Brown.

His style of smooth undulating grass, which would run straight to the house, clumps, belts and scattering of trees and his serpentine lakes formed by invisibly damming small rivers, were a new style within the English landscape, a "gardenless" form of landscape gardening, which swept away almost all the remnants of previous formally patterned styles.

Could be thread split day today, were a lively debate to be sparked. All it would take is for someone to say something interesting.

Union wrote:All it would take is for someone to say something interesting.

That is a big ask Union...

Jack Whitehall is a ©unt.

Panda in Snow or Bill Cosby? Who do you like more?

I played on a Golf course in Durban. Monkeys bloody everywhere. Then on a hole with a water feature there was this black guy 'swimming' with a bag in his mouth whilst scouring the lake bed for balls. Knicked a couple of mine and wouldn't give them back the bastard.

Union Cane wrote:Could be thread split day today, were a lively debate to be sparked. All it would take is for someone to say something interesting.

What, now?

I went through a golf ball collecting phase with the local kids. At one stage we were raking them in... then cashing them in at the clubhouse.
We used to chuck them off cliffs (or drive them occasionally) into the valleys. Hit a few homes along the way.

Just remembered - had a Buck's party where we were all dressed up as convicts (with ball & chains). The groom wore loud Hawaiian clothes.
We were all pretty smashed. Some of us started chucking brown eyes, flashing our Hamptons... driving golf balls into distant houses. It was pretty stupid behaviour.

However, as we approached the clubhouse and carpark area the police van was there waiting for us. They quietly ushered the groom into the paddy wagon whilst we all went off to the restaurant.

Then at about 8pm he arrived saying "thanks guys.... for all of your support!"
His future wife worked with kids who had been traumatised so she wasn't too happy or impressed with our big day out - to say the least.
She almost called the marriage off but he begged his way back into her favour.

Big mistake in retrospect.

(I think she is a cold, greedy, calculating, heartless and fake person. Think she senses that I think that too. Too bloody bad I say...)

"Dressed up as convicts"....

seanmichaels wrote:"Dressed up as convicts"....

Yes, just need to open my wardrobe, right? It's already all there.
Personally I hate fancy dress but that day felt special.
It was one of those days you'd get hoarse from laughing too much. We all thought we were hysterically funny. Phucking exhausting day really.

Complete with bar of soap Sean?

Italian Turkey Burger with sweet potato wedges 8/10

Shepherds pie with a slice of cheese flan and a pomegranate 7/10

Afternoon Shah, thought you would be all over the Off Topic today mate?

I see it is open again, shall we run a book on how long?

2 chicken legs

The Loaded Dog wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:"Dressed up as convicts"....

Yes, just need to open my wardrobe, right? It's already all there.
Personally I hate fancy dress but that day felt special.
It was one of those days you'd get hoarse from laughing too much. We all thought we were hysterically funny. Phucking exhausting day really.

Remember being on a chaotic stag do (even by my standards)in Estonia back in 2005. I'd gone a day early on the thursday and been on the fizz until 5am friday morning. Later that morning the stag and the rest of the party turned up. Went to a pub at 10am latest and the the best man ordered 68 pints of lager most of which had had to be downed by the time the last pint was poured. Anyway, the best man was dressed as a convict (black and white stripes) with ball and chain. He's about 4'11 and one sight I'll never forget is him launching himself (in fancy dress) over a table in MacDonalds whilst throwing a punch at a group of 6ft plus East European skinheads. Not a pretty ending....

seanmichaels wrote:

The Loaded Dog wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:"Dressed up as convicts"....

Yes, just need to open my wardrobe, right? It's already all there.
Personally I hate fancy dress but that day felt special.
It was one of those days you'd get hoarse from laughing too much. We all thought we were hysterically funny. Phucking exhausting day really.

Remember being on a chaotic stag do (even by my standards)in Estonia back in 2005. I'd gone a day early on the thursday and been on the fizz until 5am friday morning.  Later that morning the stag and the rest of the party turned up. Went to a pub at 10am latest and the the best man ordered 68 pints of lager most of which had had to be downed by the time the last pint was poured. Anyway, the best man was dressed as a convict (black and white stripes) with ball and chain. He's about 4'11 and one sight I'll never forget is him launching himself (in fancy dress) over a table in MacDonalds whilst throwing a punch at a group of 6ft plus East European skinheads. Not a pretty ending....

You can't take Ronnie Corbett anywhere.

Took my mate out for his 25th birthday (twenty years ago this week) Got the landlord at our local pub to put him a shot from every bottle form the top shelf of the optics in a pint glass then fill it up with a combination lager, bitter, cider, Guiness, crème de menthe and a splash of Old Spice aftershave (we were obsessed with Eddie Hitler's drinking exploits from "Bottom" and our favourite lines at the time were (Ritchie) How did you get this drunk on £1.75? (Eddie) There's a sale on at the Chemists...Old Spice, 25p a bottle!!!!) Anyway he downed it in one, excused himself and serenely walked outside to vomit the lot back up again before coming back to carry on drinking.

At closing time we went to get a taxi and decided to jump into the fountain in Bradford City Centre (resulting in a VERY nasty eye infection and me and my mate could never really get the stink out of our leather jackets). We decided to go for a Curry and as we went in to see a dozen people eating, the owner took one look at us dripping rat p!ss and fountain water on his carpet and informed us they we shut.

Managed to convince a taxi driver to take us home, I got dropped off and left the others to it. Turns out birthday boy was convincing the driver he wasn't drunk by alternately quoting Shakespeare and vomiting into his lap ("Look, I'm catching it for ya!) However he "ruined it" by throwing up in the map pocket of the passenger door so was booted out of the taxi, he kicked the door in frustration and was chased by the taxi driver. He ended up three extra miles from home, wet through in NOVEMBER and horrifically drunk. We went to check on him the next morning and were greeted with stony faces from his folks. Turns out he'd drunkenly gone to the loo and sh*t down the stairs instead. In the morning they made him clean it up and he puked repeatedly and had to clean up that as well.

I thought it was hilarious!

superflyweight wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

The Loaded Dog wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:"Dressed up as convicts"....

Yes, just need to open my wardrobe, right? It's already all there.
Personally I hate fancy dress but that day felt special.
It was one of those days you'd get hoarse from laughing too much. We all thought we were hysterically funny. Phucking exhausting day really.

Remember being on a chaotic stag do (even by my standards)in Estonia back in 2005. I'd gone a day early on the thursday and been on the fizz until 5am friday morning.  Later that morning the stag and the rest of the party turned up. Went to a pub at 10am latest and the the best man ordered 68 pints of lager most of which had had to be downed by the time the last pint was poured. Anyway, the best man was dressed as a convict (black and white stripes) with ball and chain. He's about 4'11 and one sight I'll never forget is him launching himself (in fancy dress) over a table in MacDonalds whilst throwing a punch at a group of 6ft plus East European skinheads. Not a pretty ending....

You can't take Ronnie Corbett anywhere.

You can if you stick him in the pocket of your combat pants

He may have been the bloke who left classifed information on a train somewhere....

I can get pretty wild on a night out. Once, on the train home, I stood even though there was a seat available.

Galted wrote:I can get pretty wild on a night out. Once, on the train home, I stood even though there was a seat available.

Have you taken the week off work?

Nope, have found a spot near my desk where I get sporadic reception.

Galted wrote:Nope, have found a spot near my desk where I get sporadic reception.

I've found a spot near my desk where I get a sporadic erection.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:Nope, have found a spot near my desk where I get sporadic reception.

I've found a spot near my desk where I get a sporadic erection.

Ladies toilets?

rick_dagless wrote:Afternoon Shah, thought you would be all over the Off Topic today mate?  

I see it is open again, shall we run a book on how long?

Thought Id be merciful

Adam D wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:Nope, have found a spot near my desk where I get sporadic reception.

I've found a spot near my desk where I get a sporadic erection.

Ladies toilets?

Nah, the window. Wasps all over it in the summer

hello

anyone home?

I'm not trying to sell anything.

Just pumping up my post count.

Luckily I'm typing slowly so the flood control doesn't irritate me.

It's my birthday soon.

Next month in fact.

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