The Azzrentice - Task 1

First topic message reminder :

Good morning.

You stand here before me, the brightest and best fake online football managers the country has to offer. One of you will be walking away with prestige. Bragging rights. A title to echo throughout the fake online football management ages. I am looking for someone with a rich knowledge of the history of our beautiful game. Someone who understands how to play the game, Someone who has the brains to get behind the football and into the business. And most importantly, someone who knows what fans of the game want, and how to grow and expand the game to even greater heights.

For the first task I am going to split you into two teams. Team 1 will have three managers - Viva, Marky and Nando. Team 2 will have the other three managers - GSC, Trebs and Miky.

The first task has three components. First, I want you to name your teams and give me sound reasoning as to why you have chosen that name. I don't want to hear silly names like 'Team Januzaj the diver' or 'Team Scholes the greatest player ever'. I want a name that you feel represents everything that is great about our game.

Second, you must elect a team manager. Choose wisely, choose effectively.

Finally, the meat of the task. Having dispensed with the veg, you will now sit down and craft me a vision for the future. The future of the global game. I want your teams to give me a strategy for FIFA. A blueprint to the improvement of our game. In 2015 there will be a vote on who will be the next leader of FIFA. I want your team to tell me what its plan would be. It can cover any aspect of football - business, grass roots development, profit sharing, anything - but you must limit ourselves to five points only. I also want an explanation of how you would practically go about implementing your five points, and how you would pay for them.

Submissions must be handed in by midnight next Monday 23 March. I'll see you in my Boardroom on Tuesday and I can tell you now that on the losing team, one of you will be fired.

Koba wrote:We're called Team Pele.

You should have mentioned that in our submission!

And so it begins

I will be back in 5 mins im going to make some toast.

No team name was provided, other than Fernando posting it after the fact. That was the team name I was given and so that is your team name. Who chose it?

Azzy wrote:So, to the gist of it. I gave you 5/5 for the concepts - all were sound proposals. However, I gave you 0/5 for showing me how each concept would be funded, and only 3/5 for implementation.

Who came up with each of the ideas? And how much did you assist each other with the writing? Did you look over each person's submission or do stand-alone proposals?

And who came up with the team name?

Sorry, is this aimed at us or them?

Marky wrote:

Koba wrote:We're called Team Pele.

You should have mentioned that in our submission!

You've got a pair of eyes and hands and I hope you've got a brain. Could have easily ammended it.

Azzy wrote:No team name was provided, other than Fernando posting it after the fact. That was the team name I was given and so that is your team name. Who chose it?

Team "Fifa's Underworld of Corruption, Kickabouts, Ethics and Diving - Official Football Federation was my idea, with some input from Nando but I stated that if its a problem that I am 100% accountable.

Koba wrote:

Marky wrote:

Koba wrote:We're called Team Pele.

You should have mentioned that in our submission!

You've got a pair of eyes and hands and I hope you've got a brain. Could have easily ammended it.

Hang on, I only noticed it this morning when it was too late to edit. Your mistake there "boss". It may not even be relevant.

What about the concepts? Who wrote each one?

Afro wrote:Think I would hav picked Integrity as the winner as well.

Although the giving more World Cup slots idea is terrible. Firstly, you say it gains you African votes - ignoring the ethics element, would it not cost you European votes as well? And secondly, one of your early points was about raising money. Europe (UEFA, tv companies and sponsorship focus) is one of the biggest contributor to FIFA funds, so reducing European teams will hit the FIFA finances.

Who ever came up with that one didn't think it through IMO

That was the one I queried. Other suggestion I had was moving WC qualifying to a single block (or at least the majority of it) the summer before the WC to increase interest, raise funds via improved bidding rights, and bring clubs back on board.

I noticed it had no name last night.

It was my trump card though.

Azzy wrote:What about the concepts? Who wrote each one?

I wrote the parts about World Cup hosting and Racism. We agreed on the points then Viva assigned who would write which parts.

Nando did Stock Exchange and Video Technology, Viva did Corruption.

Though personally id sack whomever decided on the stock exchange idea.

I didn't come up with that one but I like it, it shows transparency and makes money.

Thank you Marky. Based on your feedback I have made my decision.

Better the devil you know in that regard.

Also they made $2.5bn from the Brazil World Cup Contract which makes it  a profitable & viable stock exchange company

I liked it as well but didn't agree with the equality payments. Nando, that was down to you, as was the rather expensive video tech idea. Having a panel of three people would mean every weekend in England alone, 138 people need to be employed and given travel and accommodation. Multiply that around the globe, that’s a huge cost. A good idea but terrible implementation.

And so...

Yes im fired Despite Viva doing absolutely nothing that Marky or I couldn't have done

#AzzysFavorite

If you list FIFA on the stock exchange you at least become transparent that you're open to selling votes.

I agree with GSC.

How can you float a regulatory body on the stock exchange? It just doesn't fit as a listed company.

It turns it from an organisation whose focus is on governance, to being about shareholder returns. And the money made would be largely directed to the pockets of shareholders. Most investors are pension funds. They aren't going to invest in an organisation that gives money away.

And so...Viva, you forgot to add the team name to your submission. You also failed to state that we don’t know what was in the bidding report. It would be naïve to think the only corruption present in fifa is in the bidding process. Also there are legal difficulties with releasing such a contentious and potentially libellous document.

I think you know what's coming...

What's to stop a large consortium buying a controlling stake and selling World Cups. As you said, it made 2.5 billion from Brazil.

Listing it on the stock exchange is a sign you prefer it as it is to actually fixing anything.

Doesn't matter now im fired Despite Viva doing absolute nothing literally did that paragraph, Marky & I did the ideas then he handed them out and took the easy work & botching the project by not even changing the name to what he requested.

A double bluff?

What's coming is that...

Nando, there were some serious flaws in your proposals.

Double firing?

Azzy wrote:What's coming is that...

Nando, there were some serious flaws in your proposals.

There may have been flaws but atleast i attempted something unlike Viva piggybacking Me & Marky as he usually does. A 5 year old could of written his paragraph. He contributed zero apart from taking the easy work

But Marky...I didn't like your dismissal of Africa for hosting World Cups. It was even more bizarre to suggest a co-hosted World Cup between NORTH AMERICA and AFRICA. You didn't tell me how much the fines would be for racism - is £10k large or £10m? I didn’t like the vagueness of funds going back to fifa’s accounts either – why not put the fines to specific use such as putting it into the world’s poorest nations to assist with venues or programmes? If you fine PSG £10m for racism, does that affect FFP? What legal scope is there for challenging it? What would you do if challenged?

Added to that, the team name. Which is an offence to the game.

For that reason...

Has a whole team ever been sacked before on here?

We don't really know what the biggest issue was yet Azzy, we're equally guilty of coming up with ideas you didn't like, and we probably all made mistakes. But Viva didn't do his one point properly, didn't include a team name or an introduction or anything as the one who was team leader. He did a decent job of delegating but should pay for his mistakes.

Is the Teflon Don about to slip through again!!

*sits and scratches balls* Get it over with Azzy i don't care It's better to try & fail then do nothing and piggyback.

I didn't say a co-hosted world cup between North America and Africa. Read it properly FFS.

Azzy aint reading it to save Teflon Don despite hes little and botched work..

Only bids from North America and Africa would be considered for that year.

Most likely bids from Africa would be merged with North America in our bidding process

That reads as merged bids to me.

Someone came in my office by the way. Where was I? Oh yes. Viva...

Yes Lord Mahmood.

You're safe. I gave you four points - one for team name, one for becoming manager, and two for your topic. Zero for team leadership as your team clearly hates you and you forgot to add the team name. See you next week.

So...

Thank you Lord Mahmood.

Gold, Jerry

glad I decided not to take part

Marky, you're fired. I had you, Nando and Viva all on four points, but I gave you -1 for the team name. I was very clear that I didn't want to hear silly names like 'Team Januzaj the diver' or 'Team Scholes the greatest player ever'. I wanted a name that you feel represents everything that is great about our game. Team F etc was not that.

Next task coming up later today.

Anyone surprised by that....No didnt think so

#Favortism

Nando, you're through, what on earth are you complaining for? You all came out equal but Marky lost a marky for the team name. 1/3 of the task was the team name and he muffed it.

I'll swap places with Nando for the next task Lord Azzy. To save drama

I don't get how Viva got a point for the team name, and Marky got -1 for the team name?

Yet no team name was actually submitted.

Because Viva contributed zilch bar 1 agreed paragraph whilst Marky did 2/came up with ideas & actually put some effort in and changed the name to something much worse but actually relevent despite the acronym