Nadal to be knighted after saving ballboys from sweatshop like conditions

Ballboys' Trade Union leader Rafael Parera Nadal is on the verge of receiving a knighthood today, according to rumours circulating on the social networking website 'Bebo'. It is reported that Princess Kate's mother in law has been impressed by the work of Parera, whose concern for ballboys and ballgirls all across the world have received world wide appraisal.

It appears now that Rafael Nadal is the only thing which stands between their state, and the conditions of NIKE sweatshop workers, as he continues his determined effort to speak up for their conditions in between his busy schedule of helping charities in India and playing a bit of tennis.
And not for no reason.

Earlier this year the ATP shocked all human rights activists by reducing the amount of time a ball-boy had to run and fetch towels. If their job was not strenuous enough, due to this inhumane rule by the ATP they now have to run and hop even quicker than they did previously, within 25 seconds now.
And then there was another shocking twist, to add salt in the wounds of the ball-boys, they not only have to run quicker, they have to run quicker mostly on hard-courts. Hard Courts have been proven to cause more injury and strain (http://hartru.com/uploads/downloads/Doc_74.pdf) but unfortunately only Nadal has called for the amount of hard courts the balls boys have to run on to decrease, suggesting that surfaces such as clay will be better for their knees.

Never since Bob Crowe randomly called a tube strike in London last year has there been such an exemplary example of pure altruism.
The only reported Brit to be unhappy was Nigel Farage. 'This is another example of a European trying to influence what goes on in this country. If ballboys in France want to be treated like royalty that's up to them, but here in Britain there's nothing we love more than seeing some athleticism and hard-working British spirit. And what's going to happen if Nadal injures his knee when he visits Wimbledon this time? I'll tell you what, he'll be another foreigner entitled to disability benefits. Vote UKIP.'

Congratulations to Sir Parera


Amritia3ee

I hope this is "Spot the deliberate mistake" His Name is
Rafael Nadal Parera
There is No Sir Parera unless you are referring his Maternal Grandfather

The rest was actually quite amusing

If their job was not strenuous enough, due to this inhumane rule by the ATP they now have to run and hop even quicker than they did previously, within 25 seconds now.

Good one IMBL

Of course, if he really wanted to help, he could always towel down a bit less...

I wonder if this is the first time ever that Rafa, Bob Crowe and Nigel Farage have been included in the same article?

HM Murdoch wrote:Of course, if he really wanted to help, he could always towel down a bit less...

I wonder if this is the first time ever that Rafa, Bob Crowe and Nigel Farage have been included in the same article?

Well I see most times Rafa runs for the towel by himself so I won't blame him here

HM Murdoch wrote:Of course, if he really wanted to help, he could always towel down a bit less...

I wonder if this is the first time ever that Rafa, Bob Crowe and Nigel Farage have been included in the same article?

He is one sweaty dude. It isn't surprising that Nadal is a humble champion and cares for the children. Let us all remember what about the children!!!!

It Must Be Love wrote:Hard Courts have been proven to cause more injury and strain (http://hartru.com/uploads/downloads/Doc_74.pdf)

From the same study... Rallies on clay last longer so the demand on endurance is typically higher.

Notice the date on the study is November 2003, while Nadal turned pro in 2001, so Uncle Toni did not get a chance to read it and continued to push Nadal/Sir Parera towards greatness knowing HC was bad for Nadal but was the price to be paid for greatness and a place in Tennis history. Could Nadal have switched to Football or Golf, if Toni had read the study?

HarTru makes only Clay-based courts, so perhaps a marketing tool for what they sell.

You may also want to read this - http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2424107/

laverfan wrote:

It Must Be Love wrote:Hard Courts have been proven to cause more injury and strain (http://hartru.com/uploads/downloads/Doc_74.pdf)

From the same study... Rallies on clay last longer so the demand on endurance is typically higher.

What on earth has that got to do with the ballboys?
If not anything the long rallies give them a chance to rest.

It Must Be Love wrote:

laverfan wrote:

It Must Be Love wrote:Hard Courts have been proven to cause more injury and strain (http://hartru.com/uploads/downloads/Doc_74.pdf)

From the same study... Rallies on clay last longer so the demand on endurance is typically higher.

What on earth has that got to do with the ballboys?
If not anything the long rallies give them a chance to rest.

They should all play 54-shot or 71-shot rallies to give the ball boys some extra rest.

laverfan wrote:

It Must Be Love wrote:

laverfan wrote:

It Must Be Love wrote:Hard Courts have been proven to cause more injury and strain (http://hartru.com/uploads/downloads/Doc_74.pdf)

From the same study... Rallies on clay last longer so the demand on endurance is typically higher.

What on earth has that got to do with the ballboys?
If not anything the long rallies give them a chance to rest.

They should all play 54-shot or 71-shot rallies to give the ball boys some extra rest.

He tries his best.

laverfan. What are you talking about if Rafa had decided to play football or golf how could he have helped the ball boys?

It Must Be Love. It's good that knighthoods are now being handed out for selfless acts of altruism and to foreign nationals. This award has gone up considerably in my estimation... (cough)

hawkeye wrote:laverfan. What are you talking about if Rafa had decided to play football or golf how could he have helped the ball boys?

He would have helped officials of the respective sports. Here a couple of examples...

Golf - Has no time limit on practicing your swing, does it? The poor Caddie would have back issues though.

Football - The ball would never go 'out' and both teams could play endless midfield duels (with Djokovic on the other team), giving the ball catchers on the sidelines an interminable vacation. The two line referees would never need to raise their flags (see my 71-shot rally reference). Can you imagine a Football match lasting 5:53?

Rafa would be better off helping the ball-boys and girls by not making them be on towel duty after every point and therefore making sure they are smeared by all manner of his disgusting bodily fluids.

None of the other players towels are smeared with disgusting bodily fluids... they all smell of s Cant imagine why

I don't doubt it, they're all as bad as each other.

He's the one that whinges about it all the most though.

He's standing up for them.

I have to admit, I find the towelling of the players excessive and annoying. And then they chuck the towels a lot of times right at the ball boy when they could just as easily at least hand it to them. And after every point. I think they should make the players stash their towels on their side and not even allow them to treat the volunteer ball boys and girls like serfs. As a tennis player you abuse that match towel I know when I have had sinus I have blown snot into that towel plenty of times and I am sure the modern players have done that as well. I have seen them chuck into the ball boys face without so much as acknowledging the kid. Frankly I am a djokovic fan and I wouldn't want his or anyone else's sweaty towel chucked into my face and be forced to run around for their towels, why should these kids.

Exactly Socal.
We should in-fact have the time between points expanded to 40 seconds so they have time to towel themselves and bit it back on the chair. For the ballboys.

Rafa does seem to sweat more than most, so to be honest I think he deserves a full minute rather than just 25 seconds for others

In fact, maybe one of the ball boys could even be tasked with the job of rushing to the baseline with a chair so he can have a little sit-down in between points ........

lags72 wrote:Rafa does seem to sweat more than most, so to be honest I think he deserves a full minute rather than just 25 seconds for others

In fact, maybe one of the ball boys could even be tasked with the job of rushing to the baseline with a chair so he can have a little sit-down in between points ........

I would agree, but I think it's too strenuous for the ballboys. Carrying something while walking on a hard court is very difficult and not good for the patella frankly.
We need more clay, and chairs that can come out of the surface.

Perhaps players could employ destitute Romanian orphans to towel them down. I've no doubt Rafa's heroically charitable nature would approve of this idea.

JuliusHMarx wrote:Perhaps players could employ destitute Romanian orphans to towel them down. I've no doubt Rafa's heroically charitable nature would approve of this idea.

Farage would get too mad, Nadal may be heroic but he doesn't want UKIP behind his back all the time.

Different sport - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytjD4f_I0sc

No ball boys, towels, you sweat, you put it outside the court. No soft drink barrel, bring your own water. Pick it up if it is outside the court by yourself.

laverfan wrote:Different sport - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytjD4f_I0sc

No ball boys, towels, you sweat, you put it outside the court. No soft drink barrel, bring your own water. Pick it up if it is outside the court by yourself.

No different to the old days LF , no chairs either. drinks dispenser "Robinson´s Lemon Barley" behind the umpires chair..help yourself. The use of towelling headbands and sweat bands were introduced primarily by McEnroe and Borg... to combat the sweating on court.. and certainly they never threw any into the crowd.
Ball girls and boys were just that then.that is all they did .. orphans chosen from Doctor Bernados childrens home

I have just found this

THE REAL REASON FOR THE TOWEL ON COURT.



http://tennisassist.com/2008/07/talk-to-your-towel/

Quote from an article about the use of towels.

Greg Rusedski is often credited – or blamed – for starting the modern habit of asking the ball boy to fetch the towel after almost every point. Are you proud of yourself, one tennis fan asked Rusedski this summer, to which he replied: “It was my ritual and I have to say it must have been annoying to watch and play against. But we all have our silly rituals.”

He was like a little boy asking his mummy for "blankeeee".
All he was missing was a wet nurse sat waiting for him between ends.
Pathetic.

Absolutely, Lydian...

Must have been reading Charlie Brown...

In those strips, Linus can be seen carrying the blanket around and sucking his thumb.

http://peanuts.wikia.com/wiki/Linus%27_Security_blanket

PS: Was it a replacement for something else in Rusedski's case?

Nadal takes too long to save all ballboys in time.

They all do now...Murray, Nadal, Djokovic...it's Blanket Central out there.
At least Fed just gets on with it.

IMO mental rituals are an excellent way of dealing with the stresses involved in match play. Particularly when the stakes are so high. I'm impressed when players deliberately adopt such strategies. To me it's one of the many impressive things about Nadal (the water bottles, the towel etc). They work! It's no coincidence that Nadal is one of the toughest players mentally.

And laverfan. Wasn't Linus with his blanket the "genius" in those peanuts cartoon strips?

lydian wrote:They all do now...Murray, Nadal, Djokovic...it's Blanket Central out there.
At least Fed just gets on with it.

I agree but Fed has one ritual he examines his raquet strings during any break in play.. perhaps he talks to his raquet instead of his towel

hawkeye wrote:And laverfan. Wasn't Linus with his blanket the "genius" in those peanuts cartoon strips?

Despite Linus' intelligence and mature vocabulary, juvenile aspects of his character are also displayed; for example, Linus is almost always depicted holding his blue blanket --- for which he is often the subject of mockery from other characters --- and often sucking his thumb.

From the source which causes wry smiles (as per https://www.606v2.com/t40894-i-wouldn-t-use-wikipedia-as-proof-of-anything-but-this-made-me-smile - thanks to HMMurdoch)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Linus_van_Pelt

Haddie-nuff wrote:I agree but Fed has one ritual he examines his raquet strings during any break in play.. perhaps he talks to his raquet instead of his towel

Flicks his hair, spins his racquet, adjusts his belt, can yell You F***ing stopped on a rare occasion, and Karaoke sometimes - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hJmcGepzQo4. As can Nadal - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JWRYv3ADmok

What an amazing talent our favourite Tennis players have!

PS: Thank god Laver and Rosewall did not participate in Karaoke.

laverfan wrote:

hawkeye wrote:And laverfan. Wasn't Linus with his blanket the "genius" in those peanuts cartoon strips?

Despite Linus' intelligence and mature vocabulary, juvenile aspects of his character are also displayed; for example, Linus is almost always depicted holding his blue blanket --- for which he is often the subject of mockery from other characters --- and often sucking his thumb.

From the source which causes wry smiles (as per https://www.606v2.com/t40894-i-wouldn-t-use-wikipedia-as-proof-of-anything-but-this-made-me-smile - thanks to HMMurdoch)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Linus_van_Pelt

Geniuses are often subjected to mockery. They are often more aware that the world can be a scary and dangerous place. But the really clever ones learn how to cope. That security blanket helped enable Linus to play wonderful pieces (on his toy piano) and use philosophy to explain the crazy world. What could the mockers do beyond laughing? Sell lemonade and play baseball badly. Pfft! I know who my favorite character was in Peanuts.

I think that both Nadal and Federer adopt mental strategies whilst playing. They both put on a game face with their headband that only rarely do they let slip. They both look and act very different whilst playing and only take the game face off with their headband at the end of a match. Most players try to be way more "cool" whilst playing. They don't want to risk looking like they've invested everything just in case they lose.

hawkeye wrote:They don't want to risk looking like they've invested everything just in case they lose.

That may be a disservice to all the Tennis professionals I know.

Hearing now according to my sources that Djokovic is getting really jealous.
Just threw a tantrum at the Uniqlo HQ and whined about NIKE having too much power these days.

Berdych comes in support of Trade Union leader Nadal and the ballboys:

"It's not a matter of only my serve. I mean, what should I do with the ball boy? Should I run to pick up the ball instead of him or what should I do?

You just stand there waiting for the ball, just waiting for the guy. What you can do? The time is running. And then the referee tellS me ‘hey, I will talk to them, they are slow. But first I have to give you a warning’. How is this working?"

http://www.sport360.com/tennis/berdych-latest-star-rage-atp-time-violation-rule#sthash.F1f7eydL.dpuf

Haha - yes, we so often see players standing around waiting for ball boys without any balls to give them.
Also, the umpires are still allowed discretion in those circumstances. Berdych - stop being such a silly boy!

It is only a matter of time before ball boys realise they now have acquired great power. Drop a ball, throw it in the wrong direction or even hide them in pockets and pretend you have no idea where they have gone... and oh what a pity (name of player who hasn't paid up or been knighted for saving ballboys from sweatshop conditions) gets a point penalty when break point down in the 5th set of a slam... Whoops!

hawkeye wrote:It is only a matter of time before ball boys realise they now have acquired great power. Drop a ball, throw it in the wrong direction or even hide them in pockets and pretend you have no idea where they have gone... and oh what a pity (name of player who hasn't paid up or been knighted for saving ballboys from sweatshop conditions) gets a point penalty when break point down in the 5th set of a slam... Whoops!

Yes you're right; this move also puts powers in the hands of match fixers.

hawkeye wrote:It is only a matter of time before ball boys realise they now have acquired great power. Drop a ball, throw it in the wrong direction or even hide them in pockets and pretend you have no idea where they have gone... and oh what a pity (name of player who hasn't paid up or been knighted for saving ballboys from sweatshop conditions) gets a point penalty when break point down in the 5th set of a slam... Whoops!

For someone who has probably discussed this issue more than anyone else, it would really be quite helpful if you could get the penalty right. After all, that is the only actual change in the rule.

Perhaps, we should have Tennis indoors only where ballboys will ply their trade in a climate-controlled environment and hence will never have to sweat, unlike the players.

No, but then the ball boys may have Vitamin D deficiency.